Friday, September 28, 2012

Vinnie DeSporto has a few words to say to NFL fans.

Yo, Vinnie DeSporto here, so listen up. By now, I imagine the book readin' folks dat normally flutter around this page know better than to check in on Fridays. Why? Because I made arrangements with dis TW Brown person. Or rather...my close associates, the Gamoochie brothers have explained to Mister Brown the concepts of juts what it means exactly to be swimmin' wit da fishes. And not the ones in those sissy aquarium things he got sittin' on his desk.

First things first...I have not yet received my thank you cards from youse folks dat have been locking in to Vinnie's Picks. Two-and-OH Boy is it gettin' hot in here! Have I not explained to all of youse dat the Atlanta team will be winning the Big Game dis year? It was almost embarrassing to watch a geriatric Peyton Manning limp around in that orange jersey...but you should get used to it. He's done. This week, I present to you the Motor City Kitties. Yes, it will take more than a measly five point spread to make Minnesota competitive.

Now, on to my new feature...Pus Bag of da Week.


Tasty. Anyways...NFL Fans everywhere...you are Vinnie's Pus Bag of da Week. For three weeks, all I've heard is "Replacement referees dis, and unqualified to ref high school refs dat." Youse people make me sick. Year after year I am forced to listen to the whines and moans of irate callers with lives so miserable dat dey actually think calling in to those sports talk radio shows has any meaning. And every year I have to listen to people cry about how lousy the NFL refs are and dat dey rely on instant replay to do their jobs now. And while dat may have some truth...to act like bringing back these doctors and lawyers on Sunday who work the field wearing convict stripes will somehow make everything all better...I gots two words for ya. Puh Leaz!

Ask Raider fans about the Brady rule...or the Immaculate reception. Hell...ask the Raiders anything because if any team in da league knows about penalties...its da Raiders. Face it folks...Refs are bums. And now that this silly strike is over...you'll be glad to see 'em back until they miss the first "obvious" call against your team. And for anybody who thinks da refs cost Green Bay the game? Pull out your Tivo. ALL THREE Green Bay scores came after phantom calls kept their drives alive after those Seachickens shut down the offense on third down...INCLUDING the only Packer touchdown that came as a result of a pass interference call against Seattle that had less contact between the defensive back and receiver then my girlfriend Estelle Scarpelli has with me after chili and pickled egg night. "But Vinnie," you whine through your wilted cheesehead, "what about the penalty against the Packer DB on the Seattle receiver?" Did you not see the handful of blue jersey clutched in the tiny fist of the Packer defensive player ALL THE WAY DOWN THE FIELD?

I rest my case. Anyways...Steppin' on toes from da Rose City, I'm Vinnie DeSporto, in your face.

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