Friday, May 24, 2013

Mark Tufo...meet Vinnie


Yo, Vinnie DeSporto here so listen up. After slapping around the Heck's Cherub trying to pass himself off as a mean lookin' biker-type who goes by the unlikely name of +Armand Rosamilia, I now turn my attention to one of those writin' weenies who is proof that you start to look more and more like your pets over time...or is it the other way around. Oh well...dis week, I gots a few things to say about the author of the inexplicably popular series...Zombie Fallout. Yep, I'm talkin' about +Mark Tufo

First off, dis guy already has 27 strikes against him...he's a Boston Red Sox fan. Now, I would let him refute me one-on-one here about how much better da Yankees are, were, and shall remain, but I am afraid if I tossed him a slow roller, it might go between his legs.

I got a minor bone to pick wit dis Tufo guy...first being that he lives in MAINE! What's the matter Tufo... Delaware closed for remodeling or something. I mean hey, da least you could do is live in a real state. Or are you hopin' dat Stephen King might break down on your street so's dat you might actually be able to at least claim  dat you met a real writer?

Now...lookin' at the picture above...are you da one on da left or da right...please don't tell me you are da one wearin' a Ghostbusters tee-shirt. What's da matter Tufo? Your Milli Vanilli one in da dryer?

Now, I am led to believe dat you served in da Marines. You were what? A clerk? I mean, I've met real Marines and not even da GaMoochie Brothers will collect debts from dose guys.

Now, can I ask a question about your book series? Zombie Fallout? Is dat how you describe your love life or your hairline? Just curious.

Anyways, I figure dats enough for now...join me next week when I toss out a few morsels about dis chick who reminds me of a love child between a dominatrix and a librarian. Yep, you're next Suzi.

Until next time... Steppin' on toes in da Rose City, I'm Vinnie DeSporto, in yer face.

4 comments:

  1. I don't watch hockey, so I have no idea what y'all are talking about.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have Vinnie's crazy voice stuck in my head as I read these blips. Freaking funny!

    ReplyDelete